December 21, 2008

• Shooting the Wise Men

  
  

  
  Shooting the Wise Men
  
  Saturday dawned fair and bright and was a perfect day to get together with my brother and his family at my mom’s for our yearly Christmas Celebration O’ Fun.
  
  I got to my mom’s around noon, and I was irrationally starving. I had a decent breakfast, but I could have eaten the north end of a southbound skunk. Thankfully, the food my mom had lined up was a bit tastier.  Did you ever read a description of a feast in a book and think, “Wow. I wish I could have been there!”  Wish on.  Shrimp, lasagna, ham, stuffed shells, salad, pickled eggs, hot rolls, pumpkin cheesecake, chocolate mousse thingies, candied walnuts, cookies, peanut M-n-Ms…mmmmmmm.
  
  

   
  
  

  After we foundered ourselves, it was time for Cousin Pictures in Front of the Tree.  This year, they even posed with Grammy Peep and PapaJohn.

   
  

  
  Once the torture of being photographed was over, it was time for…presents! My sister-in-law made me a gorgeous quilt.  It has on it key dates in TGD and my life together: when we were born, our first date, marriage, kids’ birthdays, homes purchased, jobs TGD has held, etc.  The first square says, “All because two people fell in love” and the last one says, “And the best is yet to come.” 
  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  All the children scattered to put together new Lego sets or to find more food or a football game.  Grammy Peep soon called everyone back to tell them a story she wrote. Here are the essential details, although it’s my version of the tale, not hers exactly.

  
  

  
  

  “Today, I’m going to tell you the story of this nativity set. (The one at her feet.) Many years ago, Grandma and Pop Pop got several boxes in the mail from Aunt Edie. Most of the boxes were marked, “For Christmas,” but one box was labeled, “Open now.” Inside the box was this nativity set: Mary and Joseph and three Wise Men. But there was no baby Jesus. We thought this was strange, but then we thought that Aunt Edie was going to have them open a box with baby Jesus in it on Christmas day. That was just the sort of thing she might do.
  
  Christmas morning came and all the boxes were open, but no baby Jesus!  I (Grammy Peep) called Edie and said, “Where’s baby Jesus?”  She laughed, thinking I was joking, but I explained to her how the nativity had arrived with no baby nor a manger. “But, Jesus was there,” she insisted. “I wrapped him up carefully and put him in the bottom of the box.”  When the box was opened, Grandma and PopPop must have thought the wrapped baby was just a pile of packing material.
  
  I called them and explained that Jesus was in the box.  “But, we threw that box out weeks ago!” they cried. 
  
  And so, we don’t have a baby Jesus for our nativity. We’ve looked and looked to find one, but none seem to match the set.
  
  How many of us throw out Jesus?  Instead of keeping Him the focus of Christmas, we toss Him out with the wrappings.”
  

  It was a great story.  And then, we shot the Wise Men.

  Gockle had just gotten a Nerf 20-shot gun thing earlier that day.  After the story, somehow a Wise Man got pegged. We all thought this was pretty funny and had a competition. Who could shoot down all the Wise Men?

  
  

  Mary and Joseph were exempt from the carnage, but the poor, unnamed Wise Men were fair game.
  

  
  

  

  We had a first round, and if you shot down all three Wise men, you made it into the finals.  Gockle, Uncle Brad, Cousin Em, and Hunter were vying for the title. 
  

  
  

  The winner?  Cousin Em who only took 12 shots to knock down all three Wise Men! (That’s her dad, Uncle Brad, pouting beside her.)
  

  
  
  

  My mom, who has a little bit of everything, quickly got her hands on three medals for our awards ceremony.  Someone even hummed The Star Spangled Banner. (Unfortunately, if you had a giant head, the medal didn’t quite fit over it…)

  

  After that rousing match which left some “physically and emotionally drained and needing a nap,” the Christmas Charades game was brought out.

  Cindy Lou Who?

   

  As if this weren’t enough laughter and fun in the day, LibbyK and Cousin Em went to the computer and made some Elf Yourself movies. (http://www.elfyourself.com/)  If you’ve not yet seen a movie or made one yourself, I highly recommend it for some free holiday laughs. Just a hint–when choosing your pictures, pick faces with expression: anger, silliness, surprise, etc.  Smiles are great, but when an angry elf appears and starts doing the Charleston, it’s hilarious!
  

  
  

  Although the evening ended on a somewhat damp note with the toilet breaking and overflowing onto the downstairs computer, we really enjoyed the day.
  
  

  May your Christmas be as merry and bright! And may Santa not shoot you with a Uzi tonight.
  

  
  

      
  

  
  

  • 4:38 pm
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